2015 Reflections & 2016 Goals – A Very Personal Post

2015 Reflection 2016 Goals

For about 2 days now I’ve been going back and forth, contemplating whether or not to publish this blog post, mainly because I am terrified of the feedback I might receive.  In this blog post, I am basically baring my soul to each & every person who takes the time to read it.  In a way, I feel comfortable sharing my thoughts and experiences with you – but it scares me too, because I don’t know how you are going to feel about me (or my blog) after reading some of the things I have to say.  All I ask for is that you keep an open mind, don’t judge me, and have faith that all will be okay in the end.

Before I properly get into the blog post, I think it’s best that I mention this is going to be a very personal blog post.  If you are not a fan of personal blog posts or you prefer to only read about beauty products, then I suggest you give this one a skip.  The only reason why I mention this, is because I received an email from a lady last year that took me by surprise, but I also understand why she sent it (we all have our likes and dislikes).  I’ve always been a very open-minded person and I believe in freedom of speech, as long as it’s constructive.  I won’t repeat everything that she said, but the gist of it was that she decided to unfollow me on my social media platforms because she doesn’t enjoy reading personal blog posts.  This confused me a bit because in all 3 years of me blogging, I’ve only ever written 3 or 4 personal blog posts.  Anyway, she said I am a beauty blogger and should focus on beauty reviews and lifestyle posts (if I would like to talk about personal things, I should rather create separate blog for that).

Needless to say, I replied and politely told her that I was a person way before I became a beauty blogger.  As an individual I have feelings, experiences, opinions, and struggles – and I think most of my readers like it when I occasionally include personal blog posts, because they get to know me better.  My readers get to know the actual person behind the blog, not just the blogger who blogs about beauty products.

I will definitely continue to write these personal blog posts every now & again.  It is never my intention to depress anyone or ask for sympathy – on the contrary, I always try to uplift and motivate people.  I think it’s sometimes easy to forget that the perfect Instagram photos, the edited selfies, and the tidy / spotless beauty room tours are not a true reflection of anyone’s real life.  We all have bad hair days, days when our eyebrows look like second cousins instead of sisters, bad skin days, bloated tummies, and days when we walk around for at least 2 hours before someone points out that we have lipstick on our teeth.  You know what I’m talking about, right?  I always try to keep it as real as possible here on the blog, and most of you have seen me without a speck of makeup in at least one of my YouTube videos.  We are all just human, and I like to remind myself and everyone else of that every now & again by posting a personal blog post.

Anyway, let’s get to the real reason why I am writing this blog post.  Before we get swept up into the new and exciting start that 2016 brings I wanted to look back on 2015.


I think it’s safe to say that I am very happy to be leaving 2015 behind.  There is absolutely no denying that it was a very tough year for me, both physically and mentally.  I’m not going to sugarcoat it – 2015 sucked.  A lot.  But let’s start with the positive highlights first:

♥  I became Amelia’s godmother (she is definitely the most beautiful little human being I have ever met).

♥  I made new friends – blogging friends and even the virtual ones that I haven’t met in person (that’s YOU in case you were wondering).

♥  I discovered the magic of Unicorn Horn Bubble Bar from LUSH and Bath & Body Works products (read this blog post to find out how I got my hands on their products).

Now, let’s get to the not-so-great things that happened during 2015:

The year started with me recovering from surgery, which was extremely painful – you can read all about it here.  So that kind of set the tone for the year ahead.  And this blog post explains how I felt for most of 2015, trying to elaborate on my feelings would be a waste, because the post sums it up perfectly.

I have Endometriosis…there, I said it.  Don’t get me wrong – I’m not ashamed of it, but I would much rather have nothing to do with this disease.  Infertility and excruciating pelvic pain are the main symptoms of Endometriosis, and the worst part?  There is no cure – there are short-term treatments, but no cure.  Which means I will have to undergo the same surgery I had at the end of 2014 again, and again, and again.  Having Endometriosis doesn’t mean that all women will become infertile (some women go on to have children) but I think it’s safe to say that having struggled to conceive for 3 years now, probably means that my chances are slim.  I can go on the pill or hormone treatments, but it’s a vicious circle because the pill will keep me from falling pregnant and hormone treatments will only suppress the symptoms for a certain period of time.  There is so much more I can say about this disease, but that’s not what this blog post is about.

As mentioned, Neal and I have been trying to conceive for quite some time now.  We still haven’t been blessed with a little baby, and just thinking about it makes me cry.  When I had the surgery a year ago, I had already reached Stage 4 Endometriosis but the op went well and all the growths were removed, even my appendix.  The best chances of me falling pregnant were 1 to 6 months after the surgery.  After month number 6, I started losing all hope, I spiralled into a very deep depression and eventually decided to take a time-out.  Falling pregnant has been put on hold for the time being, until mid 2016 (I’m turning 33 on the 8th of February and I can’t help but feel time is running out).

I am someone who always needs to be in control (Type A personality), and it is extremely difficult for me to accept that *possible* infertility is something I have absolutely NO control over.  Being able to conceive isn’t something you can study really hard for, or work super long hours for, or buy for a certain amount of money – it just doesn’t happen for some people unfortunately.

During July, August and September of last year, I went through the most difficult time of my life.  I don’t want to go into detail, because it’s still a very sensitive subject for me.  I was forced to deal with childhood demons – it was either that, or the alternative was much, much worse.  Combine that with the fact that I was already going through a rough time with the whole ‘pregnancy issue’, let’s just say I was at an all-time low.  I struggled to get out of bed in the mornings, I didn’t want to eat and I didn’t take care of myself.  Being ‘happy’ isn’t something that comes naturally for me, and thinking back I now know that I have been clinically depressed since the age of 12.  Possibly even before that, but I can remember a specific day in Grade 6 where I sat in the bathroom and wished that I just didn’t exist.

I have been working really hard these past 5 to 6 months to heal myself once and for all.  Having to pick yourself up after a breakdown, is one of the most exhausting and challenging things one could ever go through in life; and I refuse to do it again.  We all have our own special time when we are ready to deal with certain things in our lives – sometimes it takes us a week, or 4 months, or 10 years.  There is no right or wrong time, but what’s important is that when that time comes, you do everything in your power to make it happen.  I have been both at my weakest and strongest these past 6 months – I have had to do things that most people will never have to do in their lives.  And I am proud of myself.  Because right now, I am doing what is right for me.

I don’t want it to sound like I’m speaking in code, but I also don’t want to elaborate on everything I am dealing with right now.  I have accepted that this road is going to be long, and it will be challenging but with the help of others I know that I have it in me to do what needs to be done, in order to help myself.

I am so blessed to have Neal in my life, he has truly been my rock through all of this.  Neal, thank you for loving me when my mind was a mess.


I would also like to focus on the amazing things that happened to me (i.e. the blog) during 2015:

My blog photography improved and I also worked on my own individual style of photos – I spent a lot of time researching lighting, camera settings, photography tips, lenses,  etc.  Did it pay off?  I like to think so…

I am so grateful that I had the blog to keep me going throughout 2015, and I am so thankful for each and every single one of my loyal blog readers.  I can’t tell you how much I love receiving tweets, encouraging comments, ‘likes’ and motivation from you – it is definitely the highlight of my day, every day.

Because of you and me = our combined efforts, Pink Peonies:

♥  Was featured in Your Family magazine – read about it here.

♥  Was featured in Finesse magazine – read about it here.

♥  Was featured in The Citizen newspaper.

♥  Was featured in a Red Square and Edgars electronic newsletter that reaches over 250 000 subscribers.

♥  Was Beauty South Africa’s first ‘Blogger Of The Month’ – read about it here.

♥  Was asked to host not one, but TWO beauty Q & As on the Clicks Facebook page.

♥  Collaborated with top brands such as Giorgio Armani, Red Square, Kiehl’s, Real Techniques, Foschini, GlamCubes, Dermalogica, and Retail Box on campaigns and giveaways.

♥  Also reached some follower milestones: 15 000 followers on Facebook, 5800 followers on Instagram, 4600 followers on Twitter, and 1700 subscribers on YouTube.

♥  I was also flown down to Cape Town on a couple of occasions to attend makeup trend shows and beauty events.

2015 was definitely THE YEAR I was blessed to work with so many amazing brands – way too many to list in this blog post.  And I am so excited to work with them again this year!

She Designed A Life She Loved


I don’t do the whole ‘New Years Resolutions’ thing, because each year I have a tendency to break them before the month of January is over.  I do, however, like to set myself some realistic goals to achieve throughout the year so I can stay on target as much as possible.  Bear in mind: These are goals and if I don’t achieve all of them during 2016, I’ll be 100% okay with that.

♥  Stop being so hard on myself – I am my own worst critic, and that needs to stop.  I think it’s because I am a perfectionist & I always want everything I do to be perfect.  I need to accept that not everything will always be 100% impeccable, and that’s okay.

♥  Upgrade my DSLR camera (which is also the camera I film my YouTube videos with), I want to feel at the top of my blog / vlog game in 2016.  Come hell or high water, I am going to research the heck out of photography and videography lighting.  Here’s to even better snaps next year!  *ching*

♥  Speaking of snaps (the photo kind, not the Snapchat kind), I want to go on a photography course this year.

♥  Speaking of courses, I also want to go on a barista and makeup course during 2016.  Wild, right?

♥  Make more time to read more books.  There’s nothing quite like getting lost in a great book, especially when it takes your mind off all the stresses in your life.

♥  Try a few new hobbies – I recently bought myself a Happy Planner (I’m so in love) and I want to get into the whole daily planner planning thing…  Not sure what I’m talking about?  Take a look at this blog, and this blog, and this YouTube channel.  Not only will this help me be more creative in a way other than beauty blogging, but it will also help me be a lot more organised.  I’m also planning on designing my own planner stickers, like the ones you can buy on Etsy, mainly because shipping stickers to South Africa is so costly (even if you use AGS).

♥  Be more social online (engage more with fellow bloggers and my readers) but also know when it’s time to unplug, switch off, and be present in the now.  Neal and I have made a rule in the house – no social media after 18h00 at night…and that goes for him too, since he is addicted to checking out mountain bikes, road bikes, fat bikes, and jump bikes on Instagram.

♥  Take one day off a week to relax with Neal, and pamper myself.  Yep, I am a full-time blogger (and occasional vlogger) and trust me, it’s not a normal 8am to 5pm job.  A lot of time and effort goes into creating the content that I put out.  I have to work 6-day weeks, and long hours.

♥  Drink more water.  That’s the only health / diet related goal I am setting for myself because I already eat relatively healthy.  Except for the microwave butter popcorn, ice creams, and the odd Coke on weekends.

♥  Stop feeling bad about not being able to blog about every single PR sample that is sent to me.  It’s impossible, and I’m sure most brands & PR understand that not all their products will be featured all the time.

♥  Start doing charity work again.  I definitely want to get involved with charity projects during 2016 – I volunteered at Wet Nose Animal Rescue Center for quite some time a few years ago and I really enjoyed it.  Being able to walk all the dogs that were cooped up in their cages was the best feeling in the world.  And the dogs LOVED it!  Unfortunately Wet Nose moved to Bronkhorstspruit, and it is a very long drive for me to get there now.  I’m quite a shy person (especially when it comes to meeting new people), so working with animals has always been the best option for me.

♥  And a very personal goal is to be spontaneously happy, not consciously happy in 2016.  I know it sounds weird, and it probably makes no sense to most of you…but it’s something I’m working on.  I want to make it clear that I am NOT pretending to be someone I am not, by writing cheerful blog posts.  Blogging is my happy place, it’s a place I go when I’m feeling overwhelmed and despondent.  It’s therapeutic for me, it uplifts me, and I really do feel happier once I’ve published that special blog post that I know my readers will enjoy.

I really hope you don’t think any less of me after reading this blog post.  If you got to this point in the post – well done!  You made it through all that jibber-jabber without falling asleep.  Here’s a virtual cupcake with lots of sprinkles.

Do you have any new goals for 2016?

P.S.  My ‘Best Of Beauty’ series of blog posts will start tomorrow, I can’t wait to share my favourites with you!



  1. 13 January 2016 / 11:51

    Thank you for sharing your story. You are one of the people that inspired me to start my own blog “This Life of Mine”. Your realness is inspiring and above that your blogs trust worthy and honest.
    God bless you on your journey.

  2. Arleen Marree
    13 January 2016 / 11:54

    Great blog post! You are an inspiration for us all. Please do design your own range of planner stickers. There is such a gap in our SA market for things like this. Jump on that bandwagon and own it! You are so creative and I love your style. Keep up the great work. I love your blogs and your videos. xoxo

  3. 13 January 2016 / 11:55

    I am sad to hear of your struggle but so happy that you are fighting for your Joy!
    I wish you all the best for 2016 and cannot wait to watch you show life who is boss

  4. 13 January 2016 / 11:58

    This is without a doubt the best thing I’ve read in a very long time. As sad as it is to read your struggles, i smile through my tears for your victories and accomplishments. You’re my favourite blogger, not a day goes by where I don’t check your blog or even watch old videos of yours. You’re such an inspiration and you’re really such a powerful woman. I hope that 2016 is a million times better than the last and know that posts like these make us understand, appreciate and love you more.


  5. Randee September
    13 January 2016 / 11:58

    Thank you for sharing. Very brave of you. Heres to 2016 🙂

  6. Cherise Finlay
    13 January 2016 / 11:59

    Wow… dankie! Dankie dat jy dit gedeel het.. ek het nou saam met jou hartseer geraak. Baie mense het nodig om hierdie te lees. OP sekere plekke vertel jy my storie. Hang in there. En mag 2016 een van die bestes wees!

  7. Nats
    13 January 2016 / 11:59

    Thank you for this blog post. I know it’s hard to open up to so many people but I think you’re so brave for sharing something so personal with us. I hope 2016 brings you so much more joy and happiness, and never lose hope! I love reading your blog and I’m sure you will fulfil many of the goals that you have set for this year <3

  8. Janei Viljoen
    13 January 2016 / 12:01

    Sending Love to you! You are a wonderful woman and I love the occasional personal blog post. Wishing you the best 2016
    PS: I want to go with you on all those courses. Definitely things I want to learn too

  9. Gina
    13 January 2016 / 12:02

    Wow! I can’t believe that anyone could ever think any less of you for putting yourself out there and opening up and sharing so much of yourself and what you have been going through.
    Wishing you a truly, deeply HAPPY year in 2016 – a year filled with spontaneous happy moments, and true acceptance that some things you just can’t control – and it’s ok to just let them go and move on.

  10. Rozanne
    13 January 2016 / 12:04

    Thank you for sharing lovely lady! It must have been super tough. I am sending all the positive thoughts possible your way! Keep the faith xx

  11. 13 January 2016 / 12:08

    You know I think what you’ve been through makes you brave. I think youre tough for having this on your plate and sharing it online with basically everyone who reads it… i am also sure there will be someone you touch with this. Someone will know exactly how you feel!
    If you ever want to talk about rubbish, you can always bother me anytime and I’ll make life a little boring for you 😀

    My goals for this year are a few: walk at least 3 times a week, learn how to do henna art (especially on hands and feet), get like 10 subscribers on my Youtube, get my drivers license, read 12 books, crochet more (like finish the mandala bag i start a lifetime ago) and that’s all really.

    You go on girl, you be down if you need to but then pick yourself up and be as fabulous as you are deep down!
    We are all our own worst critic and some days the most important bit about waking up is that we got to breathe even when sheet was falling from the ceiling.

    • 13 January 2016 / 12:08

      also new blog layout – yes I like! better than old one!

  12. 13 January 2016 / 12:13

    Shame on the reader, and I really liked your response. I dont know how some people think bloggers are robots churning out reviews without real lives or feelings. Anyway, thank you for sharing, I always like a glimpse into someones lives, and best of luck for this year! P.S. if you want to do an online photography course, there is on available on Groupon for R99. I signed up, I am not sure how good it will be, or how useful , but it is worth a try. And I definitely think you photos have improved, I have serious envy when I look at them… But good envy 🙂

  13. Nisha Prinsloo
    13 January 2016 / 12:14

    Sending you lots of love and well wishes! Thank you for sharing, Im quite certain your story will receive more positive than negative reactions and comments. Praying for a beautiful lil bundle of joy for you in 2016!

  14. Michelle
    13 January 2016 / 12:14

    Hi Luzanne – wow thank you this is such a brave post. 2015 was also horrendous for me, here is my turn to get personal, hehe, ended off the year with 3 weeks of massive bleeding and had to start 2016 with an op to sort it out. If ever you want a friendly person to chat to and just have coffee with please email me xxx

    Lots of love

  15. Ronnae
    13 January 2016 / 12:29

    Thank you for sharing Luzanne, I find your blog posts helpful and inspiring. I too have been trying to conceive for a long while now, it has become draining and stressful. I hope 2016 is our year for all our heart desires. All the best with your future goals and can’t wait to read your 2016 posts. 🙂

  16. 13 January 2016 / 12:36

    I think all your readers wish they had a personal relationship with you, you are an amazing person and somehow your personal posts always come at a time when I need them. I too am working hard on myself this year and trying to make the toughest decisions that i know other people wont approve of. I find that we all end up living our lives for other people and we lose ourselves along the way.

    Good luck with all your goals in 2016, all your readers are here for you 🙂

  17. 13 January 2016 / 12:39

    Hi Luzanne!

    I loved this post! Not only did I enjoy reading it but it made me realize that chasing after a perfect is impossible and that we are all blessed in one way or the other, and we should totally appreciate that!

    Keep it up!


  18. Sarah
    13 January 2016 / 12:44

    Thank you for your blog post – I myself have dealt with depression and anxiety since the age of 14 and have parents with similar issues. I appreciate your honesty and the strength it took to publish your post and to continue the fight to be happy. Sending lots of love and light your way. And thank you for your amazing beauty posts – I have bought many products on your recommendation and have yet to be disappointed!

  19. Brendah
    13 January 2016 / 12:58

    Hi Luzanne, thank you for sharing (though you were hesitant and I now understand why). Sometimes sharing with strangers brings a sense of relief, because the judgement (if any) will be from afar. We all go through pain in one way or the other…be it physical, mental or emotional. At least you are owning your truth and dealing with your circumstances unlike other people who put up appearances…the beauty world is so vain sometimes. Please DO NOT give up hope of healing and having a baby, it will happen when the time is right, just find the strength and lean on your support system (some ladies who suffer with endo are not so lucky, they get insulted all the time by their in-laws and family members). I pray for your healing and happiness as 2016 unfolds…xx

  20. Tania
    13 January 2016 / 13:17

    Luzanne, you are so brave! I love what you do, you really are an inspiration! I follow beauty bloggers all around the world, and it is so exciting to have found a awesome South African beauty blogger (who understands our beauty needs and frustrations to get all those lovely products from abroad). My sister has Endometriosis too and is struggling a lot with constant pain and uncertainties about her future, thank you for sharing your story.

  21. Linds
    13 January 2016 / 13:20

    What a warm and lovely post Luzanne! Putting yourself out there like this gains a lot of respect and helps one see the person and not only the fabulous beauty blogger. So encouraging and human. Whenever you are in CPT and you want to chat, let me know 🙂 Linds

  22. Sharleen
    13 January 2016 / 14:55

    Very brave sharing your struggles. I wish you a great 2016 and have no doubt it will be a good year for you. I do enjoy your blog posts. Keep them coming

  23. Svetlana
    13 January 2016 / 15:01

    Sending you lots of love, Luzanne, and hope 2016 is a vast improvement on 2015. Really looking forward to your top beauty picks of the year posts 🙂

  24. Joanne Meyer-White
    13 January 2016 / 15:01

    You are such an inspiration… A real – life superwoman! Thank you for being brave enough to post this.. it reminds me that even the best of us don’t always have it all together – and that’s ok. The fact that you never give up is all that counts.

  25. 13 January 2016 / 16:04

    I honestly cannot believe that someone complained about the occasional personal post, and went so far as to unfollow you on social media because of it. That’s a very extreme reaction, and obviously there are other reasons that she did that – ones that she didn’t feel the ‘need’ to disclose. If you don’t agree with the way someone runs their very own blog, then fair, but don’t take things to such an extreme level, as it’s very hard to not take that personally.

    I, on the other hand, am so thrilled you published this post. I love it when bloggers I follow write personal posts, as you can see who that person is, right down to their soul, and that they’re not just someone who looks pretty all the time, and has this perfect, blissed-out life. If anything, this post has made me want to follow your blog even more (thought I don’t know how it’s possible – you’re my number 1 blog worldwide, as I really do feel like you’re amazing at what you do).

    My parents struggled with infertility, and eventually adopted my sister and I (separate adoptions, and mine was closed so I have no information on who my birth parents are). I have never once believed that these weren’t my ‘real’ parents, and I have an exceptionally strong bond with both of them. I was so blessed to have them as parents, and couldn’t have found better. However, they went through the same struggle for about 5 years, so keep your head up, as anyone who is MEANT to be a parent, will be one.

    I have also been clinically depressed since I was in high school, and have been battling it for years. This last year I had to face the reality that I’ll probably always be on the meds that I’m currently taking, and I’ve come to terms with it. I no longer feel like there is ‘something wrong with me’, which is a huge break through for me. You sound like you’re most definitely on the right track, and good for you.

    You have accomplished so many amazing things in 2015, and you were the one who actually inspired me to start blogging. With a full time job, I’ve been battling to make it a regular thing, and I’ve now been using a planner to try and get me to do regular posts on certain days of the week, and even plan in advance what I’d like to blog about. I love writing, I love beauty and I love giving people advice on products or ideas to try.

    I have also registered for an advanced make up artistry course beginning in March, 2 nights a week, and I’m SO excited. It’ll teach me everything including special effects make up, and it’s something I’ve wanted to do for longer than I can even remember. I figured that I needed to do it for myself, as I turn 30 this year, and I just need to get a better grip on the things I love to do and feel passionate about.

    Thank you for making me feel so inspired and for allowing us to see who you are as a person too.


  26. Nasrene Sheik
    13 January 2016 / 16:20

    Wow…Thank you for sharing all your struggles and successes with us. This just shows us how much more of an amazing person you are. I already knew you were amazing…

  27. Elle H
    13 January 2016 / 16:22

    Great post. And I can relate to so much of what you wrote. Wishing you only the best things in 2016 =)

  28. Lalannie Knoll
    13 January 2016 / 16:29

    I applaud you for your bravery!! This blogging world is not for the faint-hearted. I admire your determination, creativity and you for doing this. I look forward to what you have in store for 2016. Onward and upward.

  29. Nicole
    13 January 2016 / 16:38

    Just want to send you a big hug. Hope 2016 will be a special year for you. xx

  30. Erica
    13 January 2016 / 16:41

    It’s because you show your readers who you are that I trust your beauty reviews. I’m sorry that 2015 had so many challenges for you. I hope you will have happier times in 2016. I don’t comment often but you are one of my favourite local blogs. Thanks for all your hard work

  31. Chantel
    13 January 2016 / 16:42

    10/10 for bravery!! I LOVE your blog and EVERYTHING about it, but ashamed to say that I hardly ever comment… BUT this was definitely needed today!! You are a true fighter and I admire and respect you so much for that. Thank you for letting us into your life and trusting us as readers and friends. Here’s to a great 2016 =) Keep up the great work.


  32. 13 January 2016 / 17:26

    Wow! I’m so sorry for the hardship you went through and are going through. Please do share, you may be helping others who are going through the same thing or may not even know they have the disease. I absolutely love your blog and can’t get over how pretty it is. You inspire me and I’m sure you inspire a whole lot of others too, if I still lived in Johannesburg, I would have loved to meet up with you.

    Keep smiling and take comfort in the fact that you have a loving husband, a successful career and people who admire you amongst other things, I’m sure. xxx

  33. Emlee
    13 January 2016 / 17:40

    Lovely post. Nice to see that you are human like all of us readers.
    On the charity side of things, have you heard of Wollies animal project? Check them out on Facebook. I really like them, they do so much good and could do with some help.

  34. Cherry
    13 January 2016 / 18:08

    You should never feel ashamed of your thoughts and feelings. I am glad you wrote this as I have the same feeling and I can relate to what happened. I too have been diagnosed with endometrioses and I have had two surgeries 6 months apart and the tablet has subsided the pain but the aftermath is what I have to still deal with. I would love to know what helped you through everything so I can try this on my own life. Have a blessed year , God has a plan for your life!

  35. 13 January 2016 / 20:17

    So incredibly brave of you to share your story with us! I wish I knew what to say, I wish I could help you, I wish I could give you a hug. I know what you are going through, in terms of infertility. I’m in the same boat and I’m also a Type A personality, which makes is so much more difficult.

    On a happier note, I recently bought a Happy Planner too! I will be checking out the blogs and channel you linked!

    Wishing you the best year ever!
    Always thinking of you sweet lady!
    xo, Lily

  36. Jackie Heijmans
    13 January 2016 / 21:36

    Luzanne, your blog really touched me. There are many of us out there who can relate to something in your blog. I have the utmost respect for you and you must know that that specific person must be a very unhappy soul. Our comments and support will affirm that we totally disagree with her. I have only recently really started watching and reading beauty blogs and videos and I have now started looking forward to yours, even checking daily hahaha… Anyway, you have a bold, brave spirit and don’t let anyone get you down. Let them have their own drama, their own circus … Just remember girl, there are so many billions of us on this planet, so don’t let one person spoil your day! Take care and continue being beautiful and amazing! :)))

  37. Jenna
    13 January 2016 / 23:10

    You are truly an inspiration to me, thank you for sharing your story with us. In a way it’s exactly what I needed to read today.

    May you be blessed with a baby in 2016. XO

  38. 13 January 2016 / 23:26

    Hi Luzanne

    I loved reading this post because it just gave me so much more insight into who you are. I would like to wish you well for 2016, I hope it goes much better than last year and that you achieve all the goals you have set for yourself, look after yourself and Neal, as well as be happy for the life you are living.

    Your new space is stunning! And all the research you keep pouring into your brand is definitely noticed by all your followers who appreciate the effort you put into every little thing you put out there for us. Congratulations on your mile stones! You are doing amazing! And I am so excited to follow on your journey and to see all your plans unfold for 2016.

    My best wishes to you and Neal Xo

    Nihaad – Read & Seek

  39. Farzana M
    14 January 2016 / 00:57

    I love these personal posts, pls do more! I too suffer from Endometriosis and noone likes to talk about it. It is a terrible disease and I wouldnt wish it on my worst enemy. Thank you for sharing your story, your readers appreciate it. We love you!

  40. Porchia
    14 January 2016 / 09:19

    Your blog post really touched my heart, Luzanne. Thank you for being so open and honest with us. My husband and I have been struggling to conceive for 4 years now, we’ve tried IVF numerous times and have decided to adopt later this year or early 2017. Sadly, it is like you said: pregnancy is just not in the cards for some women unfortunately. It breaks my heart but we need to I have faith that everything will work out the way it should.

    Keep strong, Luzanne. You are brave and do what is best for you!


  41. Linelle
    14 January 2016 / 09:36

    Wow that was a really beautiful and honest blog post, never be afraid to share. Most of us love what you do, you have enriched my beauty knowledge so much in the last year and I enjoy reading your blog posts, even the personal ones 🙂 Keep it up and have a great 2016!

  42. Melissa de la Croix
    14 January 2016 / 10:32

    I know exactly how you feel about the endometriosis and how heart breaking it is to struggle continuously to fall pregnant and have it just not happen. I did 2 and a half years of struggling, tests, Dr appointments and the laparoscopy removal of endometriosis tissue (the Dr made it sound like a simple operation but it was really kak and they over dosed me with pethadine for pain and I thought I was gonna die ). I just know you should not give up hope! Stay positive 🙂 if there is even a small chance of one day falling pregnant then I am sure you will! You are such a very kind person and I am sure you will be blessed with a baby!
    I do know the deep painful inner suffering it takes to keep trying. I watched all 4 of my best friend fall pregnant and have their babies and I still hadn’t even fallen pregnant.
    I have now eventually after all of it found out I am 9weeks pregnant and after all the struggling and emotions I now find myself having to deal with a different feeling/emotion of finally carrying a baby.
    Thank you for writing this post! I have also writen a similar post I was also not sure about publishing. Xx

  43. 14 January 2016 / 10:56

    You are so very brave for having shared your story the way that you have… needless to say, you’re a tough cookie! All i can say is keep on keeping on doll!
    As someone who only very recently started a blog of her own, you’re are an inspiration !
    Stay strong

  44. Nadine
    14 January 2016 / 10:59

    Wow, wow and wow!!!
    I think its absolutely inspiring that you wrote this blog. Mental Health is not something that you should be ashamed of or hide from, as it is a real thing, and it is an illness which needs treatment!

    As someone who suffers from depression, I can relate to every word you have written and can probably relate to every single thought that runs through your head on a daily basis.

    Having had the courage and having sought help for your demons only means you are stronger than the illness and an inspiration to those of us who are still on that path of self discovery and healing.

    Knowing there is someone out there who feels like we do gives us hope that yes, we aren’t crazy, and that there is light at the end of the tunnel and it is fact NOT the train heading towards us!

    If anyone so much as reprimands, or belittles you for this post, delete it and ignore it, because I can tell you now, I needed this post, and in turn YOU have made me want to get better and to continue to seek the help I require and to finally face all those nasty demons from my past!

    I salute you!!

  45. Megan Hartwig
    14 January 2016 / 11:10

    I just read your post..beautiful,as always.Thanks for being so real with all of us!This is exactly what makes a great blog 🙂 xx

  46. 14 January 2016 / 11:19

    You are an amazing person inside and out. It took courage and strength to write this and I pray & hope all your dreams become a reality this year. Love each and every post you do. And you are right, yes you are a beauty blogger but first and foremost you are a person and that’s what draws me and many others to your blog and personality. Stay Strong. Never give up. Melissa xoxo

  47. Ramsha
    14 January 2016 / 11:36

    This was such a beautiful post. You’re an inspiration!
    Best of luck for 2016!
    Ramsha xx

  48. 14 January 2016 / 11:36

    It takes a lot of courage to come online and bear your soul. I am glad you didn’t delete the post. My hope for you is you stop being too hard on yourself, my hope is you find happiness and my hope is continue being brave. You have inspired me.

    Have an Amazing day Luzzane

  49. Jeanelle
    14 January 2016 / 12:15

    Jy is die sweetste mens wat ek (virtually) ken! ‘n Mens raak net liewer vir jou na so ‘n blog. Voel asof ek jou al jare ken! Ek love jou persoonlike posts – ek lees ‘n mens se posts, nie ‘n robot se results nie. Jou foto’s word altyd STUNNING geneem en ek love die nuwe blog look & feel. Mag 2016 jou net blydskap, geluk en liefde bring!

  50. 14 January 2016 / 12:32

    This is such a powerful post and I am thankful and proud of you for sharing it. Thank you for always posting gorgeous and inspiring content and brightening the world a little with this site.

  51. 14 January 2016 / 16:20

    That is an amazingly honest post, so thank you for knowing that you can share with your followers. That OTHER woman needs a swift kick up the butt. I’m wishing you all that you wish for yourself in 2016. All the very best for you and your hubby.

  52. 14 January 2016 / 18:39

    Im sorry to hear about the struggles you’re going through. I remember seeingy aunt going through the same thing but luckily she was blessed with a beautiful baby boy but through other means and not conception. I do believe that miracles dI happen and I hope you’re blessed with one. Best wishes for 2016, I hope it is a more joyous and loving year to you, your blog and Neal. Xx

  53. Shannen
    14 January 2016 / 18:54

    This was a truly beautiful post! Thank you for sharing it even though you are a beauty blogger. I found a large amount of what you said related to me on a personal level and I appreciate how it made me not feel so alone in the world. I wish and your husband all the best for 2016!

    p.s. I would love to see how you create stickers for your planner!

  54. Janine
    14 January 2016 / 21:15

    Hi Luzanne
    I dont often read blogs but I did read yours tonight and just want to tell you that there is someone who cares about every aspect and second of your life and wants to carry your hurt and heal your pain for you. His name is Jesus and He died for you and every pain you have either physical or mental or emotional. I am going to pray for you – that you will reach out to Him. Well done on what was a very difficult blog to write!
    Lots of love.

  55. Adila Roberts
    15 January 2016 / 06:19

    This was such an amazing read, something different, seeing u raw, which I think took a lot of bravery and risk just putting yourself out there, so cheers to that! I can honestly relate to the things you shared, i have also struggled to conceive for two years of my marriage and it takes a toll out of you especially when nothing happens. In your case things are different, all i can say is forget about your age, have faith and keep trying but don’t make it boring because thats the bit that tires you out and makes u feel less about yourself. From one woman to the other I wish you all the best xx

  56. Zurette
    15 January 2016 / 08:57

    Thank you for sharing and putting yourself out there. I really enjoy your blog and youtube videos – thanks for keeping it real! It is easy to feel inadequate etc looking at all the photos etc on social and paper media. You are one of the people that help me accept myself and realised I am good enough! Good luck with your personal challenges!

  57. Wendy Claassens
    15 January 2016 / 09:28

    Hi Luzanne,

    I know writing this post was very personal for you and you mentioned the hard time you had writing it and even contemplated deleting it, but I just wanted to say a BEEEEEGGG thank you for sharing such a personal part of you!
    I know it is not to some people’s taste reading personal blog posts,but like you mentioned, move-a-long!
    I think it’s AH-MAZING that you could share such a personal part of you with us, your readers. You never know what you’re putting out in the universe, might help somebody else who is going through their own struggles and how your personal journey may uplift them!
    So I encourage you to continue with YOUR blog where it leads you.
    I, personally, am fan-girling OUT OF MY MIND with your blog ~ I came across your blog when Leigh from LipGloss Girl mentioned you on one of her Instagram pics and I have now become addicted to your blog ~ I have always followed the American beauty blogs, one of my faves being Maskcara, but to have you doing such an awesome job with the beauty industry from a South African’s perspective and how we can get our mittens on some of the wonderful international products, is both informative and fun reading!
    I also love watching your Youtube vlogs, so please continue with that and I just encourage you to move away from the negative comments and feedback and keep doing it for the people who LOVE what you do.
    Here’s to a GREAT 2016 and to you achieving some of those goals you have set yourself 🙂

    Much love,
    Wendy xxx

  58. Nazli Jacobs Basardien
    15 January 2016 / 14:13

    Beautiful post.. May things go from strength to strength for you in 2016. I will keep you in my prayers that your physical and emotional pain becomes easier each and every day..
    I love your blog & channel , bugger people with their negative opinions you are doing an amazing job! Stay the humble person you are..
    All of the best for 2016 to you , you’re family and all the readers.

    love & support

  59. Bianca
    15 January 2016 / 15:22

    Thank you for having the courage to write this blog post, reading about your struggles really opened up my eyes. It’s so easy to think people other than ourselves have it all together, have the perfect lives and the perfect makeup collection (although I’m still sure you do have the perfect makeup collection) but that’s not always the case. Thank you for opening up to your readers, your blog post has helped me in so many different ways. Not only this blog post, but all your reviews and videos as well.

    2016 will be your year, I just know it. 🙂

  60. Jaxx
    17 January 2016 / 14:14

    Loved this post.

  61. Briggs
    19 January 2016 / 14:22

    I agree, it’s a way for us all to get to know you on a more real level, so THANK YOU for sharing! You are a strong and very brave woman. Be kind to yourself <3

  62. R Fourie
    20 January 2016 / 21:39

    Thank you for sharing with us

  63. Lydia
    28 January 2016 / 12:33

    Absolutely beautiful blog post. Brought me to tears in about 10 seconds flat. Thank you so much for sharing so personally, I know it couldn’t have been easy. Keep up with the good work, your blog is stunning and such high quality. Easily comparable to overseas bloggers. I wish you many blessings for the year ahead. Here’s to being spontaneously happy. Xx

  64. Lisl
    13 February 2016 / 12:18

    You may have lost a snarky follower because you were open, but today you have gained one for that very reason. I, too, struggled with endometriosis – and I managed to have two beautiful children. A miracle. A-type personality. I know it sounds crazy, but endometriosis was my great teacher.

    I learnt to relax, see that a family is not made when you have children – but way before they come. And when they did come, I parented in a gentle, connected way. So much more to say…

    I love your blog.

    Lots of love, Lisl xxx

  65. 29 March 2017 / 16:52

    I love your personal posts Luzanne. I know it takes a lot to share such about your personal life but it’s always welcomed, so thank you.

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